SILENCE!

So like always, Dr. Bukhari questions why we all are so quiet in class.

I can't put my finger on it, but I can a pinkie. This is speaking by my viewpoint - that (some?) teachers (especially at lower education levels) in this part of the world do not express themselves as friends or at least friendly in that matter. Even though the era of the rattan cane is gone, teachers still expect the class to be quiet and attentive.

Yes, kids make a lot of noise, and unnecessary ones at that, so why not ask them to make intelligent noise. Discussions, or even the dreaded "can you repeat that again, sir?" these kids look as if it's taboo to say. Teachers shouldn't really moan and sigh when hearing that, but some of them even say "you are hopeless", and at extremes, ignore them. Ignoring a child spells doom to their future.

These kids are also pressed to be right with every question. Is being wrong a sin? A sign to condemn them of being a failure? Misguided? Do teachers pressurise their pupils not to say the wrong things, as to hide how bad their teaching skills are? Lots of politics involved, even in the primary school classroom.

Well, on firsthand experience, if I wasn't being scolded by the teacher or shamefully talked back, I get jeered by my classmates. Of course, being kids, I jeer back because they jeer me. And this isn't such a rarity among any culture... or is it? Probaboly we have such huge egos such that we don't wanna make a mistake in front of our peers so that we'll never be imperfect. Yes we all are egoistical bastards. Well, maybe I am, but why is that everyone else has this problem eh.

You know Tony? The fat (actually he slimmed down the past few months, like me) guy who seems to be taking all the Maths subjects. Well, he's the "loud" guy in these classes, and I was shocked to hear a close friend say "ko suka kan duduk dakat Tony atu? bising bah ia dlm class, nda tau malu ka?" when what "bising" he does in class actually relates to the subject at hand. What is this stigma of hating people who actually asks his and maybe YOUR questions? Tony saves the souls of a lot of cowards, time in time out, IMHO.

So later in Rozy's class, I said something that I was about 75% sure. (Sometimes we are 100% sure of the answer but we never even say it) Turns out I was a bit wrong, so I covered my head in shame. Why? Why did I do that, I asked myself.

Because I was waiting for my classmates to boo me off. I was waiting for the teacher to talk trash back at me (Rozy wouldn't prolly do that but a lot of my former teachers do). Most of all, I was waiting to get the punishment for being wrong. For being imperfect.

Imperfectness is a sin in my life. Prolly yours too, if you look back.